Cold Feet
by Doctor Addison Montgomery
Summary: Kerry/Smithy/Cameron. When Cameron proposes to Kerry she couldn't be happier, but when she learns she is pregnant she must confront her feelings for Smithy. Cameron must deal with faces from his past. Hints of Andrea/Neil. -Newly updated- Please review!Xx
1. Dinner Together

**_Cold Feet_**

_KerrySmithyCameron: Kerry agrees to marry Cameron and they couldn't be happier but as the day gets closer and closer, Kerry begins to have her doubts as her feeling for Smithy rekindle. Has she made the right choice in Cameron and is it too late for her and Smithy? Read on to find out! Please review, Vikki xXx._

**Chapter One: Dinner Together**

Cameron Tait looked at himself in the mirror and adjusted his tie self consciously. He wanted to look his best tonight and he had decided to wear a suit. He was taking Kerry out for dinner and he was going to ask her to marry him, again. Cameron really hoped that she would yes to him this time and that his proposal wouldn't be so disasterous as before. He wanted it all to be perfect. He walked across the room to his bedside table and picked up the dark green velvet jewellery box. Cameron opened it and fingered the white gold diamond ring inside, he hoped that Kerry liked it. He looked at clock and realised that if he didn't leave soon he was going to be late and that really wouldn't make a good impression. Cameron quickly pocketed the ring and headed out of the house to pick Kerry up.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kerry brushed her long blonde hair with the hairbrush and stared at herself in the bedroom mirror. She was getting paranoid now and she only had fifteen minutes left before Cameron arrived to take her out. Kerry was wearing a dark blue, halterneck dress and black heels. She had had no idea what to wear and she was glad that she wasn't working that day and had been able to spend the whole day choosing her outfit. Usually she wouldn't have put so much effort into her looks just to go out for dinner but she knew tonight was going to be special. Kerry was still undecided about whether or not marrying Cameron would be the best thing for her but she knew that if he asked her again she would say yes. Kerry loved him with all her heart and she didn't want to let him go. She was just worried about making exactly the same mistake as she had with Luke. They had got married far too early on in their relationship and they obviously had not known everything about each other. Kerry was afraid of getting hurt again and she didn't want to go through another marital breakdown.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cameron pulled up outside Kerry's flat and waited with the engine running. He could see the light on in her flat and every now and then he would see her walk passed the window. As he waited for her to come outside Cameron rehearsed exactly what he was going to say to her in his head. Cameron was so nervous and he could feel his palms getting sweatier by the minute even though it was a cool March evening. After ten minutes, although it seemed much longer, he saw the light go off in Kerry's flat and then she came out through the front door. He smiled when he saw her and felt a little less nervous.

"Hey!" She grinned, getting into his car and shutting the door.

"Hiya." Cameron grinned back, leaning over to kiss her cheek. "You look beautiful."

Kerry blushed. "Thank you Cam." She smiled. "You don't look bad yourself!" She said taking in his suit and tie.

As they drove to the restaurant they talked about work and other things but avoided talking about their relationship, both of them were on edge.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"This place is amazing!" Kerry exclaimed once they had arrived at the restaurant a few minutes later. She hadn't been here before, it was a place that was usually out of her price range. Clearly Cameron wanted to make this occassion as special as possible which only increased the amount of butterflies in Kerry's stomach. The waiter showed them to an outside table on the terrace which was lit with white fairy lights and there were candles on the tables.

Cameron smiled as he pulled Kerry's chair out for her to sit on.

"I'm glad you like it." He said, opening the bottle of red wine that was already on the table and pouring it into the two glasses.

Kerry thanked him and took a sip, she felt a little more relaxed now and decided that she was going to enjoy this evening no matter what.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


	2. Perfect Moment

**Cold Feet  
Chapter Two: Perfect Moment

* * *

**

_Thanks to Lauz, Bex, Lornz, Bawbert and Kate for reviewing! Sorry it's taken a while to update, will write a lot more in half term hopefully! Please keep reviewing!  
Luv, Vix xXx

* * *

_

Cameron was going all out for this special occassion and they ordered three courses. Kerry usually skipped the starter and chose a pudding but Cameron insisted. She chose melon balls with raspberry sorbet and Cameron picked the same. They talked for a while about general things both in and out of work while they ate and waited for the main course. Kerry stared at the menu barely able to take any of it in, half of the things she had never heard of and the rest she couldn't pronounce. She looked up at Cameron to see if he'd chosen anything yet. Their eyes met across the table.

"What are you going to have?" Kerry asked self consciously, aware that she was breaking the meaningful silence between them.

"I think I'll have the..." Kerry didn't hear anymore, well not anything that sounded English to her. Clearly from the look on her face Cameron could tell that Kerry hadn't understood a word he had said. "It's like duck breast...with orange sauce."

"Ohh, right." Kerry replied whilst thinking 'why couldn't they just write that on the menu?'

"What do you fancy?" Cameron asked, closing his menu and putting it down on the table. Kerry scanned the dishes once more, feeling more and more out of place here by the moment. Finally she saw something that she recognised.

"I'll have the salmon please." Kerry replied, laying her menu down on top of Cameron's. He smiled at her and took her hands in his across the table. They stared into each other's eyes in silence for a while until a waiter appeared.

"Can I take your order?" He asked, his voice was heavily accented with French.

Cameron ordered for them both and when the waiter was gone he took hold of Kerry's hands again. There was so much he wanted to say but now wasn't the right time, he wanted to wait for the perfect moment.

* * *

Dale Smith finished his shift at eight o'clock that night and headed for the showers. It had been a long and tiring day, both physically and emotionally. Finding out about Kerry and Cameron's engagement had come as a bit of a blow to him. Smithy tried his hardest to be happy for them both but he couldn't help how he truly felt. After his and Kerry's one night stand he had realised how much she had really meant to him. Kerry had hurt him before when their first shot at a relationship failed and after they had slept together again he had really thought that something could happen between them. Instead Kerry had broken his heart by telling him that there was no future for them and that their affair was a mistake. He still loved her though and wondered if she would have felt differently if Cameron hadn't been involved. Somehow he'd have to swallow his pride and be happy for them both but it wasn't going to be an easy thing to do.

* * *

Once they had finished dessert Cameron ordered them another bottle of wine. Now that the time was approaching he found himself feeling more and more nervous. Before the proposal had been spontaneous but now he had time to think about it and there was still the huge possibility that Kerry would reject him again. He didn't know where another rejection would leave them. He wanted tonight to be special and not the end of everything between them. Once they had finished their glasses of wine Cameron suggested that they go for a walk in the restaurant garden; Kerry was pretty convinced she knew what was coming but she still wasn't sure of her own mind or her own heart. Her gut was telling her that she loved Cameron more than any other man she had ever known but another part of her was holding back and trying to save her from more pain.

"Kerry...I..." Cameron began, blushing even the shadows.

"Don't make this harder than it needs to be Cameron." Kerry smiled gently.

Cameron slowly sank down onto one knee and pulled the green velvet box from the pocket in his suit jacket.

"Kerry Young, will you marry me?" He asked, opening the jewellery box and holding it up. Kerry's eyes lit up when saw the beautiful diamond engagement ring.

There was no hesistation this time. "Yes, I'd love to marry you!"

* * *

Smithy went home to another night at home in front of the television with a can of beer and a microwave meal. Although when he began to eat, he didn't feel hungry anymore and pushed the meal around barely eating any of it. The television programme didn't hold his interest either and none of the DVDs on the shelf looked appealing right now eight. He swallowed down the rest of his beer and headed for the shower. He had to move on from Kerry but it was so hard seeing her so happy with Cameron when she could be with him instead. Clearly it wasn't meant to be but he was having a hard time accepting it. From tomorrow he wasn't going to think about her anymore, he was going to find someone new and he was going to be happy for Kerry and Cameron no matter what it took. Maybe that was going to be easier said than done. 


	3. New Faces

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 3 : New Faces**

**

* * *

**

_**Thanks to: Babybel, Lornz, xKatex and Azura's Star for reviewing the last chapter! Please keep reviewing! Hopefully chapter 4 will be up soon! Vikki xx

* * *

**_

Kerry Young and Cameron Tait were late for the briefing the next morning, they entered the room five minutes after everyone else. Both of them were far too happy to be phased by the telling off the received from Inspector Gold. They were both unaware of Sergeant Smith glaring at them from across the room. He wondered what they were both looking so happy about but he didn't want to ask. Kerry had made it perfectly clear where he stood in her life and that she didn't even want him as a friend. Smithy wasn't sure he would be able to do that anyway, he loved her too much just to be her friend.

Gina coughed loudly and carried on with her briefing after being interrupted.

"We have two new probationers joining us today?" She continued.

Smithy looked up in surprise, he didn't remember being told about this but then he had hardly been concentrating on work this morning. His thoughts were elsewhere.

"I'd like to welcome PC Hayley McDonald and PC Matthew Bailey." Gina introduced pointing a blonde haired woman and a man with light brown hair. "Sergeant Smith and PC Dunbar will be puppywalking them and I hope everyone makes them feel welcome."

This came as another surprise to Smithy, he couldn't remember being told that he would be puppywalking a new probationer. He looked across the room to where PC McDonald was sitting, she was quite pretty with hazel eyes and curly blonde hair tied in a low ponytail. Maybe this was the break Smithy needed although he had learned the hard way about the pitfalls of working relationships with Kerry. After the briefing was over, Smithy went and introduced himself to Hayley. Luckily they were assigned to the area car, it was already raining outside. Smithy and Hayley talked while the drove and Smithy found himself liking her a lot already. Maybe puppywalking her wouldn't be so bad after all, at least it meant he was less likely to be paired with Kerry or Cameron.

* * *

"Oh my God!" Honey exclaimed during their refs break in the canteen. "Look at the size of that thing?" 

Kerry looked at her, eyebrows raised until she realised that Honey was talking about the engagement ring she was wearing. She laughed.

"It's amazing isn't it? I swear I'm going to have someone's eye out with it before the day is over?"

Honey laughed too. "I'm so happy that you're engaged! Your kids are going to be so beautiful!"

"Steady on Honey!" Kerry replied, getting married was one thing but having children was another. After what had happened with Luke she was prepared to wait until she and Cameron were more settled.

"What do you think of the new probationers?" Honey asked, she had noticed that Smithy had been paired with the pretty, young copper and she wondered if Kerry still felt anything for him.

"They seem alright." Kerry replied, stirring sugar into her tea.

Honey had hoped for a more descriptive answer but she decided not to push the issue. She drained the last of her coffee and stood up.

"See you later Kerry, Dan's waiting."

Kerry waved and then went back to drinking her tea alone. She had no idea where Cameron had gone but at least he wasn't paired with Smithy today, she still hadn't told him about the engagement. It turned out that she didn't have to.

* * *

Andrea Dunbar thought it was strange that she had been asked to puppywalk one of the new probationers. She had just become a fully fledged PC herself, she wondered if it was a test or if DI Manson had put in a good word for her. Matt seemed nice too and although Andrea could think of no one else but Neil right now, she could still feel that there was chemistry between them. They were on their way back to the station to take their refs break when the radio crackled to life. 

"Sierra Oscar 1 are you receiving?"

"Go ahead." Matt replied, Andrea recognised the voice as Yvonne's.

"Assistance and back up needed at 11 Green Lane, armed robbery in progress." Yvonne told them.

"Show us dealing." Matt answered after confirmation from Andrea.

Ten minutes later they pulled up outside the property where Yvonne and Cameron's police fiesta was parked. They got out of the car and went to look for them.

"Sorry, false alarm." Cameron apologised as he lead the suspect out of the house in handcuffs. Yvonne followed him, holding the gun in a plastic evidence bag.

"It's okay." Andrea replied, glad that they had caught the armed robber but disappointed that she and Matt hadn't been in on the action.

Cameron put the suspect into the back of the patrol car and turned back to Andrea and Matt.

"You're not doing anything tonight are you?" Cameron said, it was more of a statement than a question.

Andrea had plans with Neil but obviously she wasn't going to say that.

"Um..." She replied. Matt shrugged, feeling awkward, he had only known these people a day.

"Good." Cameron replied with a grin. "You'd better be at the Canley Arms at 7, but don't tell Kerry!"

"Right." Andrea nodded, Cameron turned back to Yvonne ending their conversation.

* * *

"Have you seen Kerry's ring?" Honey asked, when she and Dan were out on patrol together. "It's massive!" 

Dan shook his head, amused by Honey's enthusiasm. "No, I haven't."

"Her and Cameron are going to be the perfect couple, don't you think?"

"Uh, yeah." Dan replied, confused, he thought Kerry and Cameron were already together.

"I'm so excited about the wedding!" Honey grinned.

"The wedding?"

"You mean you don't know?" Honey was gobsmacked. "They're having an engagement party tonight but you can't tell Kerry."

"Okay." Dan agreed, he decided to bite the bullet. "Would you like to go with me?"

"I'd love to." Honey smiled, looking forward to tonight even more now.

* * *

At the end of their shift, Hayley came out of the ladies locker room and found Smithy in the corridor. She had changed out of her uniform and her wavy, blonde hair was loose over her shoulders. 

"Have you heard about this drink tonight?" Hayley asked him. "At the Canley Arms?"

Smithy shook his head. "Are you going?" He asked.

"I think I might, it's a good chance to get to know people." She answered. "Are you going to go?"

Smithy shrugged, and then he thought about what he had promised himself the night before.

Instead, he smiled. "Yeah, why not!"


	4. Creeping In

**Cold Feet  
****Chapter 4: Creeping In**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed:D More will be coming soon! Please review! Luv, Vikki x.**

Hayley stepped out of the shower and reached out for a towel from the radiator, she wrapped it around herself and found another, smaller towel for her wet hair. She couldn't deny that she was excited about tonight, she had only been in the job one day and she was already going to a party with the rest of the relief and her incredibely good looking sergeant had agreed to go with her. Things were looking up for Hayley. Smithy had agreed to pick her up just before seven and he would drive her to the pub, Hayley was new to Sun Hill and she needed showing round a bit. Hayley put on a short skirt and then thought better of it, she changed into cropped jeans and a black halterneck top, she applied her make up and then waited for Smithy to come and pick her up. She felt like she was getting ready for a date but she knew that it was just a drink with friends, or people she hoped would become her friends soon.

* * *

Kerry rolled over onto her side and smiled at Cameron. Everything in her life was slowly slotting into place and she couldn't believe she had said no to him when he had first asked her to marry him. Her head had been all over the place then but now she knew that she loved him. To prove how she felt, she placed her hands on his chest and kissed him passionatley. Cameron rolled her onto her back and continued to kiss her, working down her neck now. She laughed happily, knowing this was the man she wanted to spend her life with. Cameron began to kiss her lips again but they were both jolted back to reality by his digital watch beeping, telling them that it was six thirty. Being with Kerry had nearly made him forget all about the surprise engagement party. 

"How do you fancy going down to the pub for a few drinks?" He tried to ask casually.

"We've got wine and beer in the fridge." Kerry murmured, rolling over to be closer to Cameron.

"Yeah I know." Cameron replied. "But I thought you'd want to go out and show off your ring."

"I do." Kerry smiled, then she pulled a thoughtful face. "Anyone would think you didn't want to have sex with me."

Cameron kissed her forehead. "Of course I do! But I want to show off my beautiful bride to be to the world. Anyway, there'll be plenty of time for this later!"

"Fine then." Kerry gave in. "Your loss." She laughed, heading for the bathroom. When she was gone Cameron breathed a sigh of relief, he hoped Kerry enjoyed tonight.

* * *

Andrea picked up the phone and slowly dialled Neil's mobile number. She hated having to cancel their plans to spend time with her friends but she knew that they came first and Neil was always blowing her off to spend time with his family or for work. She supposed that she could have invited Neil to come with her tonight but it would have looked suspicious, especially as it was only the relief who were attending. 

"Hello?" Neil answered almost straight away.

"Hi Neil, it's Andrea." She replied.

Neil's tone changed completley. "It's good to hear your voice, I've really missed you." Andrea bit her lip while Neil spoke. "I'm really looking forward to tonight."

"Ah." Andrea began. "About that. I can't do tonight, I'm sorry but something has come up and I can't avoid it." She knew she was bending the truth slightly but it was easier not to hurt his feelings this way.

"Okay. Don't worry about it Andrea, there will be plenty of other times. Take care."

"Bye Neil." Andrea said regretfully and hung up.

* * *

Smithy and Hayley didn't talk much in the car on the way to the pub, both of them were a little nervous. Hayley was still getting used to being around new people after her training at Hendon and Smithy was getting used to the idea of having a woman in his life who wasn't Kerry, even if it was only as a friend. When they arrived Smithy ordered them both drinks at the bar and then they went over to join the rest of the relief who were gathered round a few tables that had been pushed together. Smithy and Hayley found two seats together and sat down, smiling at each other nervously. Smithy couldn't help it though, he kept looking around for Kerry even though he knew it was wrong. He looked across to where Hayley was sipping her drink next to him. 

"What's everyone so excited about?" He asked, looking around at the relief who were literally buzzing with anticipation.

"Haven't you heard?" Hayley asked in surprise.

Smithy shook his head. "Heard what?"

"Kerry's getting married to the Australian guy...I can't remember his name..." Hayley replied.

"Cameron?" Smithy asked, wishing it wasn't him but knowing that it couldn't be anyone else. He went quiet and Hayley wondered if she'd said something wrong. She didn't have time to ask though because Cameron came into the room and called for quiet.

"Thank you to everyone for coming." He began. "I'd like to tell you that the rumours are true, Kerry has agreed to marry me and we're very happy."

Kerry stood beside him, grinning too, that was until she locked eyes with Smithy. He didn't know how to react seeing her there, looking so happy with Cameron. He wanted to be angry with her for hurting him but he found it so hard to hate her. Smithy just wished that she'd had the courage to tell him herself rather than him having to find out this way. Kerry tried to avoid looking at him and let her gaze fall over her friends and colleagues but she couldn't help turning back to Smithy, she wanted to see his reaction. She felt so divided between the man she loved and the man she could have loved, and still could. She didn't hear anything else that Cameron said but just smiled beside him and joined in laughing when everyone else did. Were her doubts really beginning to creep in.


	5. Bridesmaids

**Cold Feet  
****Chapter 5 : Bridesmaids**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Hope you like this chapter! I'll update when I can but I've got so much coursework and so many essays to do this week and like a million tests! Please review, it makes me happy lol! Vikki xXx**

* * *

After their announcement, Kerry and Cameron mingled among the guests and some music was put on. Kerry was actually surprised that Smithy was still there, let alone the fact that he had turned up at all. From the look on his face when Cameron had told everyone that they were engaged she was pretty sure that Smithy hadn't actually known about it. Cameron came up behind her and put an arm around her shoulders, she jumped at his touch.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump." Cameron apologised with a grin.

Kerry forced a laugh. "It's okay, I was miles away."

"Thinking about the wedding?" He asked jokingly.

"Of course!" She laughed again.

"I'm going to go and get another drink." Cameron said after draining his beer bottle. "Do you want anything Kerry?"

She shook her head. "No thanks babe, I'm fine."

* * *

Kerry used Cameron's absense as a way of being able to see her friends.

"Congratulations Kerry, I'm really happy for you." Honey said, holding up her half empty champayne glass towards her friend.

"Thanks Honey." Kerry replied, giving her a hug. Things had been difficult when she had walked in on a kiss between Honey and Cameron but they hadn't been together at the time and it was all in the past now. Kerry paused for a moment before deciding on what she was going to say next. "Would you like to be one of my bridesmaids?" She asked.

Honey grinned. "I'd really like that, thank you Kerry." They hugged again and then Kerry disappeared into the crowd to find Andrea. Why was it so hard to find people when you needed them? She scanned the room and then turned around.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry!" She apologised, keeping hold of her glass so that the champayne didn't spill everywhere.

"No problem." Kerry then saw who she had walked into. Smithy. She flushed with embarrassment, this wasn't exactly how she had wanted to speak to him.

"I'm sorry for everything Smithy." She said quietly, he had to bend down slightly to hear her over the noise of the music and people talking.

"It's okay, I just hope you and Cameron will be very happy." He said, his voice perfectly civil. His eyes betrayed him though, his smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Smithy wanted Kerry to be happy but he still wasn't sure if Cameron was the right person for her. He had nothing against the Australian PC but he just didn't think that he belonged with Kerry.

"Thank you." Kerry replied in a similar voice, once again doubting her decision. Smithy was being so understanding and that only made Kerry feel even more guilty.

* * *

Kerry continued her search for Andrea and finally found her talking to the new probationer, Matt.

"Can I speak to you for a second please?" Kerry asked.

Andrea flashed Matt a smile and then followed Kerry to a quiet corner of the Pub.

"You having fun with Matt?" Kerry asked, so far no one knew about Andrea's affair with Neil Manson and Kerry was no exception.

Andrea blushed. "He's a nice guy."

"I think you're in there!" Kerry laughed. "I wanted to ask you a big favour."

Andrea raised her eyebrows waiting for Kerry to continue.

"Would you consider being one of my bridesmaids?" She asked.

"I'd love to!" Andrea almost squealed, throwing her arms around Kerry.

"I'll take that as a yes then shall I?" Kerry smiled.

Andrea nodded wildly. "Thanks Kerry."

Kerry just smiled, everyone else's enthusiasm was having the opposite effect on her.

* * *

Cameron saw that Smithy was alone again, Hayley had gone to the bathroom so he took his opportunity to approach.

"Thanks for coming, Kerry and I really appreciate you being here..." He paused. "After everything."

Smithy nodded. "I'm happy for you both." He said, he had said it so much that he was beginning to believe that he actually was.

"Thank you." Cameron replied. "You'll be at the wedding, right?"

Smithy nodded, knowing he couldn't really say no to Cameron's face. He knew how awkward it would be if he did go though.

"Good." Cameron smiled. Smithy was silently praying that he wasn't going to ask him to be usher or anything, he didn't know how he would be able to get out of that. Cameron had been debating whether to ask him but changed his mind, after everything the three of them had been through it was probably too much to ask.

Cameron walked away to talk to someone else leaving Smithy alone in the crowd.


	6. Jealousy

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 6: Jealousy**

**Sorry that it's taken so long for me to update! Thanks to Bawbert and Lauz for putting me in a K/S mood!  
Happy New Year! Please review! Vikki xx.

* * *

**

"Hey." Hayley smiled, coming back from the bathroom and sat down next to Smithy on one of the bar stools.

Smithy smiled back at her but he felt awkward, maybe it had been a mistake to bring her here tonight. He was sure it was obvious that he was still in love with Kerry but Hayley didn't seem to have noticed his distraction yet.

"I'm thinking about calling it a night." Smithy told her after he had drained the last mouthful of his beer.

Hayley looked surprised. "But it's only nine o'clock, it seems like we've only been here five minutes. Let me buy you another drink first."

Smithy gave in and accepted another drink from Hayley but his mind was still on Kerry. He still wasn't sure if she was doing the right thing in marrying Cameron. Kerry had been hurt before and Smithy didn't want to see her go through that kind of pain again. At the same time he knew that if Kerry changed her mind and didn't marry Cameron it was unlikely that she would want them to be together either. All he wanted was for Kerry to be happy but he was finding it hard to be genuinely pleased for her and Cameron.

Smithy was brought back to reality as Hayley slammed down a shot glass onto the surface of the bar. She pulled a face and then smiled at Smithy.

"You want one?" She asked.

Smithy was about decline but changed his mind. Kerry and Cameron were enjoying themselves tonight so why couldn't he lighten up and have a little fun?

"Sure. But I'm paying." He insisted.

* * *

"Guv, I finished that report you wanted." Suzie Sim said, knocking on DI Manson's office door and poking her head inside.

"Thanks Suzie." Neil said, looking up from his computer screen.

"I'm heading off now, there's a bit of celebration going on at the Canley Arms, Kerry and Cameronn are engaged."

"That's nice." Neil said, but in his head he was wondering if that was where Andrea was tonight.

"You coming guv? Everyone's invited." Suzie said, turning to leave.

"I might do." Neil replied. "Once I've finished this report." Suzie left the office and Neil wondered if he should go. If Andrea wasn't their he could just congratulate Kerry and Cameron and leave but he hoped she would be there.

* * *

"I'm going home now Matt, see you tomorrow." Andrea said, putting down her empty wine glass and putting on her jacket.

"Okay see ya Andrea. I'll walk you outside if you like."

"Thanks." Andrea replied, she hoped that she would be able to see Neil if she left early even though she was enjoying her evening with Matt all the same.

Andrea hugged Kerry and kissed Cameron on the cheek, congratulating them again and thanking Kerry for asking her to be a bridesmaid. Matt lead the way out of the pub and held open the door for Andrea.

"I'm glad I came tonight." He told her. "I had a really good time."

Andrea smiled. "Me too."

A car pulled into the car park, the driver watched Andrea and Matthew together.

"See you tomorrow then." Andrea said, as an awkward silence descended over them.

"Yeah." Matt smiled, leaning down and pressed his lips gently against Andrea's. She responded to his kiss before pulling away and feeling extremely guilty instantly.

"Sorry Matt, I can't. I'm seeing someone." She apologised, increasing the distance between them.

"Oh okay, I'm sorry too."

The car that had been circling the car park looking for a space but it now drove out of the car park. Neil couldn't believe his eyes. Why was Andrea kissing some other guy, things between them had been going well recently, what had happened? Was this why she had cancelled their plans for tonight?

* * *

Kerry leant over the bar and asked the barmaid for another glass of white wine. She didn't notice how close she was to Smithy. He tried to ignore the feeling he got as he inhaled the subtle scent of her perfume, he had forgotten how much he missed that smell. It brought back so many memories but now wasn't the time or the place. Hayley asked the other barmaid for two more shots of vodka and Smithy drank his hungrily, trying to force all of the thoughts about Kerry out of his said. He needed more than alcohol to do that though.

Kerry took a gulp of her wine and looked over at Smithy and Hayley. She vaguely remembered seeing them come in together but she hadn't thought anything of it until now. Smithy was relaying some story that made no sense, his hand resting on Hayley's arm. Kerry felt a pang of jealousy and suddenly she was aware of what she had done to Smithy. Was it too late to change things between them? And what about Cameron? It was such a mess, she thought as she downed the rest of her wine.


	7. Too Little Too Late

**Cold Feet  
****Chapter 7: Too Little Too Late**

**Thanks to Bawbert, Lornz and Lauz for reviewing the last chapter! Will try and update again soon, I have more idea where this fic is going now...I think!  
Please review! Luv Vikki xx.

* * *

**

Kerry and Cameron got a taxi home at eleven as they both had to work the next day. When they left the pub Kerry had noticed that neither Smithy or Hayley were still there and wondered if they had gone home together. She knew it was none of her business but she cared about Smithy, maybe just a little too much.

"Are you okay Kerry?" Cameron asked when they got in. He took her coat from her and hung it up.

"Yeah, just drank a little too much I think." She laughed, her mouth still bitter from the wine she had consumed.

Cameron smiled. "Did you have a good time tonight?" He asked, pulling her into his embrace.

Kerry relaxed into his strong arms and leant her head against his chest.

"Yeah I did. Thank you Cameron, it was really sweet of you." She replied.

Cameron let go of her and took her face in his hands, his lips moving towards hers. Kerry captured his lips with hers and kissed him slowly. Cameron moved his hands to her waist and Kerry put her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. She ran her hands through his hair, forgetting for a moment that her fingers would not work their way through Smithy's dark hair. Kerry was shocked at herself, she couldn't believe that she had thought Cameron was Smithy even for the briefest of moments. To ease the guilt she was feeling, Kerry pressed her lips harder against Cameron's, trying to get Smithy's face out of her mind. The sound of the phone ringing caused them to spring apart like guilty teenagers.

Cameron picked up the phone and Kerry could hear a torrent of words coming from the other end but she couldn't quick work them out. Something serious was going on by the look on Cameron's face.

"Kim, whoa slow down." Cameron said as soon as he could get a word in. "Emily? Is she okay?"

The panic and concern in his voice was obvious to Kerry.

"I'll be right over." Kerry heard him say before he ended the call. She looked at him, her face asking all the questions that her voice didn't.

"It's Emily, she's been taken ill. I think she's been in a accident or something." Cameron explained, whilst putting jacket on and looking for his mobile phone and keys. The telephone call had sobered him up. "I have to go, I'm sorry babe." He apologised, kissing Kerry on the cheek.

"Yeah, I understand." Kerry replied. "I hope she's okay."

Kerry sank down onto the sofa, there was no way to escape her thoughts of Smithy now.

* * *

'We shouldn't do this. We shouldn't be doing this.' Smithy's conscience was calling out to him but he ignored it. The alcohol coursing through his veins made sure of that. He fumbled around trying to find the key to his flat. He finally opened the door and he and Hayley stumbled inside. Smithy turned and pressed her against the wall, kissing her passionately. He was her sergeant and they had known each other a day. It was wrong. He knew that but it was the only way he knew of to get Kerry out of his mind. She was getting married to another man, that should provide him with all the closure he needed but it didn't. He needed her but he couldn't have her.

"We shouldn't do this." Smithy managed to get the words out but he didn't act upon them. Hayley smirked as he lead her down the hall to his bedroom, kicking the door shut after them.

All thoughts of Kerry were erased for now but he knew he'd have one hell of a hangover in the morning.

* * *

As soon as Andrea got back to her flat, she picked up the phone and dialled Neil's mobile number. She waited impatiently, tapping her foot against the carpet as she waited for him to answer. Just when she thought he was about to pick up the call was cut off. She tried again and then again but the same thing happened, the fourth time she tried she got straight through to Neil's answerphone.

"Hi Neil, it's me. I think something's up with your phone, unless you can't talk right now. I know I said I was busy tonight but I'm free now if you want to come over. I'll be waiting, wine's in the fridge. Call me back please. Bye."

Andrea put the phone down and went into the kitchen. She didn't actually feel like wine right now so she went to the sink and poured herself a tall glass of cold water. Her thoughts strayed to Matt, she wondered why she had kissed him back outside the pub. Then it clicked, Neil must have seen them and got the wrong idea. Andrea poured herself another glass of water and took two tablets from her handbag. She just hoped they would help to ease the headache that she could feel coming on, her guilt however wouldn't be cured so easily.

* * *

Kerry had fallen asleep on the sofa the previous night waiting for Cameron to come home but he still hadn't. She stretched out, her neck aching already. It was now that she regretted the amount of alcohol she had consumed the night before. Kerry scraped her hair back from her face and ran for the toilet, just reaching the bathroom in time. She retched into the toilet, feeling all of the strength drained from her, she pulled the flush and sunk down to the floor, resting her head in her hands. Eventually she managed to stand, filling a glass with water from the tap which soothed her burning throat. She went into the bedroom and took her diary out from her bedside drawer. That couldn't be right, could it? She couldn't be two weeks late for her period. Kerry had been on the pill ever since she and Cameron had got back together so this couldn't be right, could it?

If it was possible, Kerry actually felt worse now. She made herself a cup of coffee but she couldn't face eating anything. She climbed into the shower and quickly washed and dressed before heading out of the house and just making it to work on time. She still hadn't heard from Cameron and she was worried. As she changed into her uniform in the locker room, Kerry send Cameron a text message asking him if everything was okay with Emily.

* * *

"Someone looks like they had a good night." Honey Harman, joked walking into the locker room.

"The night was good, it's the morning that's not so great." Kerry replied. She loved Honey's bubbly personality and her enthusiasm but she wasn't in the mood for it right now. Maybe she'd be paired with someone like Reg today who would be fairly low maintenance.

Kerry ended up entering the briefing room at the same time as Smithy who held the door open for her.

"Are you alright PC Young? You look like you had one too many last night." He said, trying to keep things normal between them.

"Thanks serge. I think you're right there." She said before going to stand with Yvonne and Leela.

Smithy scanned the room, checking that everyone was there before Inspector Gold arrived to start the briefing. As he looked around his eyes met Hayley's dark ones. He looked away, the previous night had been a mistake but he had realised that just a little too late.


	8. Kim

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 8: Kim**

**Thanks to Lornz, Lauz and Bawbert for their lovely reviews! Hope you like this chapter!  
Please review, Vikki xx.

* * *

**

Cameron hadn't slept all night. For one thing he was far too worried about his daughter Emily to even think about sleeping and for another the orange plastic chairs in the children's ward at St Hughes Hospital were not made for sitting let alone sleeping on. He wanted to get in contact with Kerry and tell her that he was okay and that Emily was stable but he wasn't allowed to have his mobile phone on in the hospital and he hadn't wanted to leave Kim or Emily alone unless he had to.

"You can go if you like." Kim, the mother of Cameron's child, said breaking through Cameron's thoughts. "I'll be okay here if you want to go home, have a shower and sleep for a bit or if you just want to phone your girlfriend, sorry fiancée." She was still getting used to the fact that Cameron was getting married to someone else. At one stage, not very long ago, she had thought that there was a chance for the pair of them to get back together and be a proper family but that time had passed. She was happy for Cameron and Kerry but it didn't mean she didn't still love him.

"I'm okay thanks. I want to stay and see Emily before I go anywhere." He told her. Emily was still in surgery after almost being run over by a car. Kim and Emily had been going home from a friends house and had been about to hail a taxi when a car pulled out and knocked Emily over. Kim had been lucky but Emily had damaged her spine and the doctors hoped they could do something about it. Both Kim and Cameron were uneasy and nervous, they both wanted their daughter to be better.

"You blame me, don't you?" Kim said quietly

Cameron turned around the face her, there were dark circle under her eyes and her blonde hair was a mess but Cameron could still see the woman he had been attracted to before.

"Of course not, it was an accident. If you want to pin the blame on anyone it should be me."

Kim looked surprised. "But you weren't even there."

"Exactly my point." Cameron said, but was prevented from saying more as two doctors approached them.

* * *

Everything was against Smithy that day, even the traffic. He and Hayley had been stuck in a gridlocked lane of the motorway waiting to exit Canley to bring in a suspect for questioning. The air between them with thick with tension but not the same sexual tension that had surrounded them the previous night.

"We should talk about last night." Hayley finally said, tired of the silence between them.

"Do you regret it?" Smithy asked, still concentrating on looking out of the windscreen rather than at her.

"No but I get the feeling you do." Hayley replied.

Smithy finally peeled his eyes from the road ahead and looked at her.

"I didn't want you to think I'd taken advantage."

Hayley let out a short laughed. "Believe me, I don't."

"Good." Smithy managed a smile.

"So, are you doing anything tonight?" Hayley asked.

Smithy hesistated before shaking his head. What else did he have to lose?

"What were you thinking?" He asked.

Hayley smiled at him. "Repeat performance?"

The traffic began to move again as Smithy nodded. He thought he could handle that.

* * *

Things between PCs Andrea Dunbar and Matthew Bailey weren't much more comfortable. Matt was clearly embarrassed about the night before and Andrea was still feeling guilty. She hadn't seen Neil yet but that was to be expected, the relief and CID only mixed in the canteen or when working a job. Seeing as Andrea and Matt were on patrol and Neil preferred to bring lunch from home rather than the canteen it was unlikely that their paths would cross today.

* * *

Kerry was paired with Tony Stamp for the day which she was glad about, at least now that Smithy was in charge of puppy walking a new PC it was unlikely that she would be working with him for a while. However, she wasn't sure if she liked the thought of all the time Smithy would be spending with Hayley. Working with Tony meant that she could avoid questions that people like Honey and Andrea would want to ask her. Already they both wanted to know when they would be going shopping for dresses, where the wedding would be held, what date it was going to be. She and Cameron hadn't even discussed these things together yet, they hadn't really had a chance. Kerry was still worried that Cameron hadn't called her.

* * *

Cameron and Kim stood either side of the small hospital bed where their daughter was lying. Emily was asleep, her light blonde hair falling over the pillow. She looked so peaceful that Cameron forgot for a moment that she was in hospital and could be critically. Kim was close to tears and she looked down at her daughter, she still blamed herself even though Cameron and one of the friendly children's nurses assured her that she had nothing to feel guilty about. Kim stroked Emily's cheek with her index finger and smiled down at her.

"Everything's going to be okay sweetie, Mummy's here now." She whispered and then stood upright to face the doctors. "Is she going to be alright?" Kim asked, unable to keep the fear out of her voice.

The shorter of the two doctors nodded slowly. "She's made a good recovery so far but we'll need to keep her in for a few days, possibly even a week, spine damage is very serious and we want to make sure that Emily is 100 better before we let her go home with you."

Cameron and Kim both nodded in response.

"I think it would be best if you let her for a while, she's been through a lot in the last few hours, as have you I expect." The other doctor told them. "Go home and get some rest and something to eat and come back in a few hours. We can call you if we need to."

The doctor's voice was calm but persuasive and Kim and Cameron agreed.

"Do you want to come back to mine? I can make up the sofa bed." Kim offered as they walked outside, Cameron was turning his phone on. He needed get in contact with Kerry before she really started to worry about him.

"Thanks Kim, but I should get home...Kerry will be worrying about me." Cameron said.

Kim nodded. "I'll meet you back here then?"

"At about six?" Cameron said, looking at his watched. "She'll be okay Kim, I know she will."

Kim gave him a weak smile. "I hope so." She said through gritted teeth. Kim looked so vulnerable standing there, scared about going home without her daughter possibly permanently. Cameron closed the gap between them and hugged her close. They broke apart a little awkwardly, both aware that the chemistry between them was still there.


	9. Headaches & Hangovers

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 9: Headaches and Hangovers**

**Thanks for all the reviews! I would've updated sooner but my computer decided to not save part of this chapter! Please review! Luv, Vikki x.

* * *

"I've got a banging headache from last night." Kerry told Tony as they walked up and down Canley High Street. "Do you mind if just pop into the chemist to get some tablets?"**

"No, I don't mind. I'll wait here for you." Tony replied.

"Thanks Tone." Kerry said, heading across to the chemist on the other side of them road. She went inside and headed up and down the aisles until she found the one she was looking for. Kerry headed to the counter with what she wanted and paid for it, accepting when she was asked if she would like a carrier bag. She didn't want anyone to know anything about this until she was certain herself. Kerry was just putting her purchase into the pocket of her uniform when her mobile phone began to ring. She took it out and walked out of the shop before answering.

"Hello?" She answered, waving to Tony across the street.

"Hi babe, it's me." She heard Cameron's voice on the other end of the line. Kerry felt herself relax a little, at least she knew he was okay.

"How's Emily?" Kerry asked.

"We think she's going to be okay." Cameron replied. Kerry found it weird that he referred to him and Kim as 'we' but dismissed it all the same, Emily had to come first right now. "The doctors want to keep her in for a while longer. I'm at home now, I've spoken to Inspector Gold and she's letting me have the next week off."

"That's nice of her." Kerry said, leaning against the outside of the chemist.

"Yeah." Cameron paused. "I'm sorry for running off last night and not calling until now. I couldn't really think straight until I knew if Emily was going to be okay."

"You don't have to apologise." Kerry sighed. "Emily has to come first and I hope she's going to be alright."

"Thanks honey, love you."

"Love you too." Kerry replied as she hung up.

"Is everything okay Kerry?" Tony Stamp asked when she crossed back to the side of the road where he was waiting.

"Yes thanks, that was Cameron. His daughter got taken ill last night but she's going to be okay."

"That's good." Tony replied. "Cameron must have a lot on his mind at the moment, with the wedding and his daughter."

Kerry nodded and murmured something in response, Cameron wasn't the only one with a lot on his mind.

* * *

When Kerry returned home after her shift Cameron had already headed back to the hospital leaving her a note telling her that he'd be back sometime later that evening. Kerry sighed, she didn't really want to be alone right now but she did need some time to think things through. She went into her bedroom and changed into a comfortable pair of navy tracksuit bottoms and a baby blue hoody and settled down on the sofa with a cup of tea to read through the instructions on the pregnancy test box. Sighing softly to herself, Kerry took the small cardboard box into the bathroom with her, she knew the next three minutes were going to be the longest of her life.

* * *

When Smithy arrived back at his flat, he went around and quickly tidied up before Hayley came over. The previous night it hadn't mattered that his flat looked like a warzone but today he wanted it to look at least respectable. He took a bottle of wine from the rack in his living room and put it in the fridge to cool off. He jumped into the shower and then changed into jeans and a shirt before waiting for Hayley to arrive. Smithy found himself pacing his living room nervously, he didn't understand why. He and Hayley were just a casual fling and in Smithy's eyes he was only with her to take his mind of Kerry and maybe even to make her jealous.

A few minutes after seven o'clock Hayley arrived and Smithy buzzed her up to his apartment. As she walked in her perfume filled the air and she smiled across at him, producing a bottle of wine from behind her back.

"Thanks." Smithy smiled, closing the distance between them and pecking her lightly on the cheek. "Take a seat." He told her before heading through to the kitchen to put the bottle of wine into the fridge. He came back a few moments later with the already cooled bottle of white wine and two glasses. Smithy handed a wine glass to Hayley and filled the glass for her before sitting down with his own drink and sipping from it.

"So..." Hayley smiled at him, taking another sip of wine before putting her glass down. Smithy did the same.

* * *

Sergeant June Ackland walked down the stairs that went down from CID and saw Andrea and Matthew walking past.

"PC Dunbar!" She called out, causing Andrea to stop and turn around.

"Yes serge?"

"DI Manson wants to see you in his office. PC Bailey, you and I are needed at reception." She said, addressing Matt now. Andrea slipped passed them and practically took the stairs up to CID two at a time. In her hurry she didn't notice DS Phil Hunter walking towards her.

"In a rush?" Phil smirked after Andrea had apologised. He was the only one who knew about their affair and she wanted to keep it that way.

* * *

Kerry was afraid to look. She didn't want to know. She wished someone could be here with her while she did this, to reassure her and tell her everything would be alright and that they would still love her no matter what. Slowly, and with trembling fingers, Kerry turned the pregnancy test over in her hand. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked at the colour stripe, it was blue. This was good, right? Kerry thought to herself, feeling relief wash over her, she wasn't pregnant. Just to make sure, she studied the instructions again, and again. She sighed, so it was true, her instincts this morning had been right, she was pregnant. She knew she had been foolish to think otherwise.

"What am I going to do?" Kerry said out loud.


	10. Under Pressure

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 10: Under Pressure**

**Sorry for not updating for ages. My stupid computer crashed and I lost this chapter and I've just got round to re-writing it! Thanks to everyone who reviewed!  
Please review this chapter! Vikki xx.**

**

* * *

**

By the time Cameron returned home that evening, Kerry had hidden all of the evidence of the pregnancy test. She had made an appointment at the doctors for the previous afternoon. She knew she had to decide what to do and that meant talking to Cameron and Smithy. She wasn't prepared to do that until she knew that Emily was going to be alright. She knew that it was unfair to put anymore pressure on Cameron who was going through so much as it was. This wasn't coming at the right time at all. Everything was too chaotic already without her pregnancy adding to it. Then again it was probably better that she had found out before she had married Cameron. It was already adding to her doubts about marrying him.

Kerry was taking a microwave meal for one out as Cameron walked in through the front door.

"Kerry?" He called, shutting the front door behind him.

"In the kitchen." She replied, trying to pretend like everything was normal between them.

Cameron closed the space between them and kissed her.

"How are you?" He asked.

Kerry smiled weakly. "I'm good. How about you, and what about Emily?"

Cameron smiled for the first time in days. "She's stable."

"Thank God for that. Have you eaten?" Kerry asked.

"Yes thanks, I ate at Kim's."

"Oh okay." Kerry replied, turning to get a fork from the drawer so that he wouldn't see her facial expression. She swallowed. "And how is she?"

"Shaken up and obviously worried, typical motherly behaviour really." He said, trying to make a joke of it. It wasn't a joke to Kerry though.

* * *

"Hayley, you should go." Smithy said, stretching and making a move to get out of the bed. Neither of them had had the intention that Hayley would stay overnight but it had just happened. "We'll be late for work otherwise." 

"Will I be in trouble with my sergeant?" She asked flirtaciously.

Smithy smiled. "No, we'll both be in trouble with the Inspector."

Hayley sighed. "Okay." She climbed out of the bed and re-dressed. "I'll see you at work then."

Smithy nodded. "See you later." He headed for the bathroom, trying to wash away the memories of the night before. He didn't really feel anything for Hayley and he knew he should end it but he just couldn't seem to.

* * *

Just when Kerry Young didn't think things could get any worse they did. She was paired with Smithy for the day. Before the engagement and before she had found out that she was pregnant Kerry would have been happy to be paired off with him. Even though they were working it meant that they got to spend quality time together, quite often ending up in the back of the patrol car. Kerry missed times like that when things were so easy between them. Now everything was so much more complicated especially with Cameron and Hayley thrown into the mix. She had seen her kissing Smithy before the briefing and it had made her sick to the stomach, it was nothing to do with the baby either. Kerry knew that she was being irrational, she was engaged and Smithy had every right to date whoever he wanted. She knew that somewhere not too far beneath the surface she still had feelings for him and maybe even loved him. 

"So, do you know the date yet?" Smithy asked as they patrolled the high street.

Kerry looked at him increduously. How could he know? Was it written all over her face?

"What?" She replied.

Smithy looked puzzled. "For the wedding. What else did you think I meant?"

Kerry laughed. "Oh yeah, not yet no." Her heart rate had increased.

"Kerry, I know we were never very good together and we're with different people now but you still talk to me you know, as your sergeant and your friend."

"Thanks serge." Kerry replied quietly. She couldn't tell him though, could she?

* * *

Cameron had the day off work and was catching up on sleep before he went back to the hospital to visit Emily. He found it hard to sleep though, he kept tossing and turning, his mind just wouldn't relax. He was thinking about the previous night. After they had left the hospital Kim had asked Cameron back to her house for dinner. Neither of them had felt like eating for days, since Emily's accident, but they knew that they needed to. Kim had put a pizza in the oven and they had talked about the old days and things they had done with Emily. Maybe it was only natural that they had shared a kiss later that evening. It wasn't like their relationship had ended on horrendously bad terms and Cameron was still a big part of Emily's life. In truth they had never really stopped loving each other. Cameron still felt guilty though, he and Kerry were supposed to be getting married soon and he was kissing another woman. He knew he should tell Kerry but would this add to the doubts that he sensed she was having already? 


	11. Screaming Infidelities

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 11: Screaming Infidelities**

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed! Sorry that its taken me forever to update! Please review and I'll try and update soon! xxx**

"Kerry, are you okay?" Smithy asked, his voice breaking through her thoughts. She looked up at him in surprised. "You've been really quiet and withdrawn all day, is everything alright?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine thanks." Kerry hoped it was convincing enough for Smithy because she wasn't convincing herself.

Smithy raised his eyebrows but said nothing in reply.

"Have you decided who you're bridesmaid's are going to be yet?" Smithy asked, trying to change the subject and dispel the awkwardness between the two ex lovers.

Kerry sighed. "I don't want to talk about the wedding, okay? Especially not with you!" She put her hand over her mouth, realising what she had said but that it was too late. "I didn't mean…"

"Whatever Kerry, I understand." Smithy replied although he didn't at all.

* * *

Cameron laid spread out on the sofa, his empty soup bowl on the floor beside him as he attempted to concentrate on the lame excuse for a daytime television programme. He was still plagued by his guilt over kissing Kim and the feelings he had for her which were rekindling. He loved Kerry and he wanted more than anything to marry her but Kim was the mother of his child. The phone began to ring, startling him out of his reverie.

"Hello?" He answered, finally reaching the phone before the answering machine cut in.

"Hi Cam, it's Kim. The doctor's want to talk to us about Emily." She said, it was impossible for Cameron to pick up anything from Kim's tone.

"Okay, I'll be right over." He said, hanging up. Guilt mixed with fear for Emily made him wish everything would return to normal or whatever that was.

* * *

When Kerry exited the station at the end of her shift, Smithy was leant against the wall outside the station.

"Hi," She greeted cautiously.

"Hi Kerry." Smithy replied.

"Are you waiting for someone?" Kerry asked.

Smithy shook his head, praying that Hayley wouldn't appear for a while yet.

"I really am sorry about earlier," She began. "I didn't mean to snap I've just got so much on my plate at the moment. Cameron's daughter is ill as well and everything is just crazy."

"Don't worry about it Kerry, it's okay."

"No, it's not. I was a bitch to you Smithy, and not for the first time."

Smithy smiled a little. "I've not always been as charming to you as I should have been either."

Memories flooded Kerry's brain as she thought back over their previous attempts at trying to make a relationship work between them. From the look in Smithy's eye he seemed to be thinking along the same lines.

* * *

"What's going on between you and Matthew Bailey?"

"Why is that any of your business?" Andrea demanded in an angry whisper. The last thing she wanted was the rest of CID overhearing this conversation.

"You're my girlfriend Andrea, I don't like seeing you with other men." Neil replied, much more calmly than the dark haired policewoman.

She scoffed. "Come off it Neil, I'm not your girlfriend! You're married for God's sake! And what's it to you if decide to see someone else, it's not like you haven't been using me all this time."

Neil looked at her with a surprised expression for a while before he could find the words reply.

"Andrea I'm sorry, but to me this isn't just an affair, I really like you." He said softly.

Andrea laughed. "What if you can't have me no one else can. You're pathetic, Neil!"

She knew she had gone to far when Neil stood up from behind his desk and walked towards her with powerful strides. He grabbed her face in his hands and kissed her passionately, pushing her towards the wall. Somehow her mind couldn't be further from Matt now.

Before Kerry could say anything else to Smithy her mobile began to ring, she saw Cameron's name on the caller display and answered quickly.

"Hello?"

"Hi, I've got to go to the hospital again. It's about Emily's condition. I'll see you later tonight."

"Okay, see you."

"Love you." Cameron said, hanging up before Kerry could echo the sentiment.

"That fiancé of mine won't be home tonight so how do you fancy going for a drink somewhere?"

Smithy smiled. "I'd like that." He said, having no clue where the evening would lead them.


	12. One Minute

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 12: One Minute**

If she had been going for a drink with someone else, even Cameron, Kerry would have gone home and showered and changed into something other than jeans and a scoop neck baby blue top. Smithy didn't seem to care though, he always saw through what Kerry was wearing and saw the real person beneath. Sometimes it was a good thing but it could also mean that Smithy could almost read her mind.

"Where are we going for this drink then?" Smithy asked from the passenger seat, Kerry had insisted on driving, it made more sense than taking two cars the short distance to one of the local pubs.

"Up to you." Kerry replied, concentrating on navigating her way through the rush hour traffic.

"The Riverside?" Smithy suggested, choosing a pub that wasn't as popular with the officers at Sun Hill. He knew he had less chance of running into Hayley there.

"Okay." Kerry agreed. Nothing more was said between them until she pulled up in a parking space.

Smithy went in first, holding the door open for Kerry who smiled at his gentlemanly behaviour. They headed for the bar and Smithy ordered a beer, he turned to Kerry to ask what she wanted.

Kerry faltered. "Lemonade for me thanks."

Smithy looked at her in surprise but ordered it anyway. They took their drinks to a free table.

"Kerry Young, off the booze? Never thought I'd see the day!"

Kerry mock glared at him across the table. "I might have to go and pick Cameron up from the hospital so I have to be sober." She lied.

"I thought you might be pregnant for a moment there!" Smithy joked, Kerry nearly choked on her drink.

"God no." She lied again.

* * *

Kim practically threw herself at Cameron when he arrived at the hospital. He was surprised, but hugged her back thinking something was terribly wrong with his daughter.

"Kim, what's wrong?" He asked in panic.

"Nothing." She laughed. "Nothing's wrong. Emily can go home tomorrow, the doctors did some more tests on her and she's perfectly fine."

Cameron felt tears in his eyes; tears of happiness.

"Thank God!" He said, pulling Kim into another hug. "That's great."

"Do you want to go and see her?" Kim asked.

Cameron nodded furiously and Kim led him through to Emily's room.

"Hey Emz, Daddy's here now." Cameron said, leaning over the side of the bed and kissing his daughter's cheek.

Emily smiled up at him. "Can I go home yet, Daddy?"

"Not yet sweetie, but tomorrow you can." Cameron promised her.

"Okay." Emily smiled. "Will you come and see me more now?"

Cameron looked across to where Kim was standing.

"If you're mummy let's me then yeah, of course I will."

Kim nodded. "Come whenever you like Cameron." She assured him.

At that moment a doctor came in and asked them to leave because visiting hours were over. Cameron and Kim kissed Emily goodbye and left the hospital.

* * *

"Somebody can't hold their alcohol like they used to." Kerry joked as Smithy stumbled back from the bar nearly spilling his beer and her lemonade in the process.

"Says she who hasn't touched a drop all evening." Smithy fired back, grinning across the table at her as he passed her the drink.

Kerry checked her phone for the thousandth time that evening but there was still no message from Cameron. She felt a little guilty for going out for a drink with Smithy while Cameron was away, especially as he was looking after his ill daughter.

"You're probably right though," Smithy said, cutting through Kerry's thoughts and bringing her back to the present. "I should probably make this my last, I have got work in the morning and I don't want to set a bad example do I?"

Kerry laughed. "You? Nah, never."

"What's that supposed to mean, Miss Young?" Smithy slurred, draining the last of his pint.

"C'mon Smithy, let's get you home." Kerry sighed, putting down her glass and leading him through the pub to the front entrance.

"I thought you'd never offer." He smirked, receiving a mock glare from Kerry.

* * *

"Hi Andrea." PC Matthew Bailey said, walking up to her on her way back from CID and her encounter with Neil in his office. Her face was flushed and pink and she felt a little breathless. Also, the last person she wanted to talk to right now was Matt.

"Hey," She smiled, trying to be friendly but not too friendly.

"Are you okay, you look exhausted."

A wry smile passed across Andrea's lips. "I'm fine thanks, Matt."

"Would you like to go to dinner with me tonight?" He asked.

The look on Matt's face made Andrea not want to turn him down but she had already made plans with Neil for a repeat performance of earlier in the safety of her flat. There again Neil was always re-arranging their dates if he had work to do or if Philippa needed him for something.

"Thanks Matt, that would be nice."

"I'll pick you up at seven thirty, is that okay?"

"Great." Andrea smiled. "See you later."

* * *

Kerry decided it was easier to drive Smithy home than make him take a taxi. Smithy and Kerry sat together not saying much to each other. When they reached Smithy's flat Kerry opened the door to help him out.

Smithy swore, rooting through his pockets and pulling out his wallet and mobile.

"What's wrong?" Kerry asked.

"I left my keys in my locker."

Kerry sighed in exasperation. "It's okay, I've got a spare."

Smithy looked faintly surprised, even in his drunken state.

"From when we used to date." She said in a low voice as she locked the car. She would make sure Smithy got inside safely and then she could drive herself home.

"Oh okay." Kerry led the way to the door and unlocked it, letting Smithy in after her. The flat looked just the same, except maybe a little tidier and Kerry felt butterflies in her stomach that had nothing to do with the baby growing there.

"I'm going to go now Smithy." Kerry said, taking the key off her key ring and handing it back to Smithy. She was reaching into her bag for her car keys when she felt Smithy's hand on her arm.

"Do you have to go?" he asked.

Did she? Kerry asked herself. It was unlikely that Cameron would be home, yet again. She didn't resent him for spending so much time at the hospital, she knew that Emily had to come first but she still felt neglected. Kerry and Cameron hadn't made love since before Emily was taken ill and she was starting to feel that she was losing him before they were even married.

Kerry had no idea who had made the first move but one minute she was debating whether to stay or go and now she was in his arms again, kissing him like when they were still together and in love with each other.

"Smithy," She broke away, blood rushing to her face. He kissed her again before she could change her mind and he was soon leading her further into the flat, in the direction of his bedroom.

By the time they reached his room, Kerry and Smithy were kissing like they had never been apart. When Smithy pulled Kerry's top off over her head she knew that there was no going back and let him remove the rest of her clothes before he pushed her down onto his bed. Cameron didn't even cross her mind while she was with Smithy, she was just glad that she hadn't begun to show yet or that would bring up awkward questions that she wanted to avoid right now. Maybe she would tell him in the morning. Unless she was very wrong tonight wasn't just about the alcohol, Smithy still really cared about her.

**Please review! x**


	13. Morning Sickness

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 13: Morning Sickness**

Kerry woke up early the next morning, to begin with she felt disorientated until she remembered where she was: in Smithy's bed. Pushing back the covers she ran for the bathroom, reaching the toilet just in time. Kerry prayed that Smithy would not wake up and hear her retching; it wasn't exactly the way she had envisioned him finding out that she might be pregnant with his child. Wiping her mouth and flushing the toilet, Kerry rested her hot forehead against the cool tiles of the bathroom wall. When the feeling of nausea had passed, Kerry turned the shower on and stepped under the spray while it was still cold.

In his bedroom Smithy woke up and saw that the space in the bed beside him was empty. Putting on his boxer shorts he headed for the bathroom. From outside he could hear the sound of retching, following by the toilet flushing and then the shower being turned on. Smithy cautiously pushed open the door.

"Kerry!" He called out, peering around the door. "Are you okay in there?"

Kerry cursed under her breath, so she had woken him up.

"I'm fine." She shouted back. "Really." Hoping it sounded more convincing to him than it did to her.

* * *

When Andrea arrived back at her flat after Matthew had dropped her off her answering machine was flashing angrily at her, the red light flickering wildly. The guilt she had pushed aside earlier was coming back to haunt her. She unplugged the machine from the socket and headed towards her bedroom, flicking on lights as she went. Still fully clothed, Andrea fell into her unmade bed. The combination of sleepless nights with Neil, long hours at work and the good food and fine wine she had had tonight had taken their toll and she fell fast asleep.

When she woke up the next morning she remembered the answering machine messages. She plugged the machine in and listened to the messages while the kettle boiled in the kitchen. As she had expected they were all from Neil, each message more irate than the next. She smiled guiltily; satisfied that she had shown him he wasn't the one wearing the trousers in this relationship.

* * *

When Kim and Cameron returned from the hospital it was late and there seemed little point in Cameron driving all the way home. After putting two ready meals into the oven Kim asked Cameron if he would like to sleep on the sofa that night.

"Thanks Kim, are you sure it's no trouble?" He replied.

"It's fine. I'd rather not be alone, I'll just worry about Emily." She assured him.

Cameron took the pile of bedclothes and pillows from Kim's arms and placed them on the sofa.

"She'll be okay, she's out of the woods now." He said, pulling her into what began as a friendly hug. Suddenly he was kissing her again, pressing his mouth hard against her's. Kim kissed him back, pushing him towards her bedroom as she wrapped her legs around his waist.

* * *

Kerry came out of the bathroom a while later wrapped in Smithy's dressing gown. He came out of his bedroom and grinned at her.

"Suits you, Kerry." He became serious quickly though. "What are you doing here? Kerry, you're engaged."

She looked down at the diamond ring in her left hand and sighed. "I know." She swivelled the ring around, avoiding Dale's intense green eyes. "I don't know how to tell you this, but I think I'm pregnant." She paused, still not taking her eyes off the ring. "Okay, I know I'm pregnant."

Smithy was unsure how to reply to this. "Oh. Well, congrats then."

Kerry finally looked up, her eyes meeting with his. "No, you don't understand, I think I'm pregnant with your baby Dale."

* * *

"Kim?" Cameron woke up, immediately pulling himself into a sitting position. "What have we done?"

Kim rolled over to face him. "I don't know. I'm sorry, I feel like this is all my fault."

"It's not," Cameron assured her. "But what am I going to tell Kerry?"

* * *

"Is that why you slept with me last night?" Smithy demanded, walking away from her and pacing the room.

"No, God Smithy, I don't know why last happened but I do know that I still have feelings for you."

"And you knew you had these feelings before you found out you were pregnant?" He asked bitterly.

"No." Kerry paused, seeing what she thought was a look of triumph in Smithy's eyes. "I knew when I agreed to marry Cameron."

Smithy stopped pacing in front of her.

"Is there a chance the baby is his?" He asked.

"It's very slim." She admitted, blushing now. "Cam and I were always more careful than you and I. Beside the timeline doesn't quite fit either."

Smithy nodded and was silent for a while. He finally broke the silence.

"Kerry, do you love me?"

* * *

Andrea pushed open the bathroom door, still wrapped in her towel when she heard someone knocking on the front door of her flat. She peered out through the spy hole and saw Neil standing outside. Smiling to herself, Andrea opened the door. Neil forced his way in, not noticing Andrea was only wearing her bath towel.

"Sorry, I'm not interrupting am I?" Neil asked, looking around as if he expected to see someone else appear. Andrea picked up on this.

"Don't worry, I'm alone." She said. "I got your messages by the way. All of them."

Neil smiled coyly. "I missed you."

Andrea smiled, moving closer to him. "I noticed."

**Review please!! Xx**


	14. Don't Believe The Truth

**

* * *

******

Cold Feet  
Chapter 14: Don't Believe The Truth

**This chapter is for Amy (LightSpirit) for making such a beautiful trailer for this fic on Youtube! Thank you, honey!  
Sorry for the lack of updates! We're getting to the end of this story now! Will try and update soon if you're still interested in reading this! Please review! x**

Dale Smith was sure he had never been more confused in his life. This whole charade with Kerry was getting out of hand and he knew now was that he loved her. He didn't know if she even loved him and he was beginning to wonder if the previous night of just finding out whether he would support her and the baby. The thought of being a father scared Smithy but he knew he wouldn't run away from his responsibilities. That was if Kerry's baby even turned out to be his. The thought crossed his mind that maybe this was Kerry's way of escaping the seriousness of marrying Cameron. He knew Kerry, and he knew that she was not the marrying type, at least not yet. She was still young and Smithy knew how much she needed her freedom. He regretted asking her if she still loved him, he knew putting her on the spot like that was wrong but he had had to know. Now, though, he wished he hadn't asked but the answer had not been what he had wanted to hear, and, if he was truthful it wasn't what he had expected to hear. She may claim to not love him but it made him wonder if she really loved Cameron either.

* * *

Kerry walked away from Smithy's flat with her head held high but her composure failed her as soon as she had rounded the corner. She leaned her back against the cold granite wall and began to cry, her breath coming in raggedy sobs and her hands subconsciously cupping her stomach. She hated herself at that moment; she hated what she had done and who she had become. Most of all she hated what she had done to Smithy. Of course she loved him, it was obvious to everyone, even Cameron, but not to Smithy. He didn't seem to understand the depth and strength of her feelings for him because if he had he never would have asked that question. Kerry was now sure that the baby she was carrying was Smithy's, the more she thought about it, the more obvious it became. When she and Cameron made love it was never with the need and urgency of when she had sex with Smithy. Cameron was a considerate lover, never failing to wear a condom if Kerry hadn't taken her pill but with Smithy sex was far more impromptu and protection was quite often the very last thing on their minds. She wondered how she would go ahead with her wedding to Cameron if he found out she was carrying another man's baby. A fresh wave of sobs broke out and Kerry slid down the wall, hugging her knees to her.

* * *

Kim was dressed and drinking coffee in the kitchen when Cameron exited the bedroom having showered and dressed.

"Do you want a cup?" She asked, tipping the dregs of her coffee into the sink.

"No, thanks," He replied. "I should get home."

"Do you really have to tell Kerry?" Kim asked she knew Cameron was a decent man who hated to lie but she didn't want their one night stand to ruin his impending marriage.

"Yes, she deserves to know," Cameron replied without a second though.

Kim picked her keys up from the kitchen counter. "Are you sure? Won't the truth just hurt her more, Cam?"

Cameron sighed. "Maybe, but we're going to get married, we can't start that kind of commitment with this hanging over us, I need to tell Kerry; I have to."

Kim smiled grimly. "Okay, Cameron, you have to do what you've got to do, I'm just sorry about what happened."

Cameron hugged her, releasing her before it moved from just a friendly hug to something more serious. "Stop apologising, Kim, we're both adults and we are both to blame."

Kim increased the space between them. "Come on, I'll take you home and then I'll be at the hospital in time for visiting hours to begin."

* * *

Smithy needed a few minutes to get his head together after Kerry had gone, but when his thoughts were back on track he realised that he needed to contact Hayley and end things between them for good. He picked up his mobile and dialled her number, waiting for an eternity for her to finally answer the call.

"Hello?" She answered, her voice sounding as if she was having trouble breathing.

"Hayley, it's Dale, we need to talk," He said, cutting straight to the chase.

"Not now I'm," She stopped as the pause was filled with a giggle and then a squeal of pleasure. "Busy," She laughed.

Smithy sighed, just when he thought things couldn't get any more awkward today. At least this made it easier for him to end their affair.

"I'll make this quick Hayley, I don't think we're working out and I don't want to see you anymore." He blurted.

There was a moment of silence before Hayley replied. "Okay, see you at work." Hayley hung up and looked over at the man who shared her bed. "Sorry about that Matt, now where were we?"

* * *

"I've got to go to work, babe," Neil Manson apologised, pulling back the covers and crawling out of Andrea's double bed. "Can I see you tonight?"

Andrea smiled across at him, pulling the covers up to her chin and breathing in the scent Neil had left behind. "I'm working from 10 til 5 so you could come by after that?" She said. She knew she was getting her hopes up about her relationship with Neil but being with Matthew had made her realise that it was really Neil that she wanted to be with.

"I'll be here," Neil assured her. "I'll miss you today,"

"You too, babe," Andrea echoed before leaning back into the pillows and falling asleep. Neil dressed and went around to her side of the bed, pressing a kiss to her forehead and into her dark wavy hair.

"I love you," He whispered, knowing she wouldn't hear him.

* * *

When Cameron arrived home Kerry hadn't been back long either. She was curled up on the end of the sofa with a mug of tea between her hands. She jumped when Cameron returned, she had hoped for a bit more time on her own.

"Hey," She smiled, trying to be normal towards him but she knew she was a wreck.

"Kerry, we need to talk," Cameron began, shutting the door and taking a seat on the opposite end of the sofa.

Kerry felt herself panic, how could he know? No one else knew she was pregnant except Smithy. She kept her mouth shut though, not wanting to incriminate herself until he had said what he needed to say. The words that came out of Cameron's mouth were the last ones she had been expecting though.

"I slept with Kim."

**Please review! xx**


	15. I Don't Want to Miss You Tonight

**Cold Feet  
Chapter 15**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Here goes Chapter 15!! Xx**

Kerry didn't know whether to be relieved or not. On the one hand at least it meant that Cameron didn't know about her pregnancy and that he may not be on the father. But, on the other, it meant that Cameron had been unfaithful and was having doubts about their impending marriage too. At least it made her feel a little less guilty about sleeping with Smithy, because, although two wrongs didn't make a right, Cameron had made the same mistake with someone else.

"Okay," Kerry said awkwardly, not sure what else there was to say.

Cameron was surprised and shocked. "I tell my fiancée I've cheated on her and all she can say is, 'okay'?"

Kerry sighed. "I haven't been true to you before and we're still here; still engaged."

"Do you still want to marry me then?" He asked.

"Yes," The word was out of Kerry's mouth before she could stop and consider everything that had happened recently.

A grin spread across Cameron's face and Kerry felt overcome with guilt.

"I love you so much," He told her. "And I'm truly sorry about what happened with Kim, we were both upset about Emily and it just happened. It didn't mean anything." Only the very last part was a lie.

"I love you too." She replied, burying her face in his shoulder as he opened his arms to her. It was true, she did love him but she also still loved Smithy too and part of her always would. There was also the issue of the baby to consider and she didn't know if she should tell Cameron yet or not.

* * *

The drive to the hospital was lonely for Kim but at least she knew that Emily was going to be okay. She just wished there had been other, more pleasant circumstances, to bring Cameron back into her life. The last few days and especially last night had made her realise that she wasn't truly over him and she was still in love with the father of her child. She also knew that she should regret the previous night because it had been wrong to sleep with a man who already had a fiancée but if Cameron really hadn't wanted to sleep with her, he wouldn't have done. That was what was confusing Kim the most. If Cameron was willing to sleep with another woman when he was engaged it must mean that his love for Kerry wasn't all that strong. Kim wondered what would happen next, and if Cameron would even tell Kerry what had happened between them. Knowing Cameron, he probably would but it still left Kim wondering how Kerry would react to the truth.

* * *

Smithy paced his living room, deep in thought; he wondered when his life had started to go off the rails so completely. Even if he had wanted to continue using Hayley to ease the heartache of losing Kerry to Cameron he no longer could because she had someone else now. It wasn't that he minded being single, in fact until recently he had quite enjoyed it; it was the knowing that both Kerry and Hayley were happy with other people. Okay, so maybe Kerry wasn't completely happy with Cameron but she was still engaged to him, at least for now. He didn't know what he would do if Kerry was pregnant with his child. Of course he would step up and offer everything he could to help Kerry and the baby but he didn't know how easy that would be if she carried on and got married to Cameron. He wasn't sure he could play second fiddle while Kerry and Cameron acted like a happy family. In fact, the thought made him sick to his stomach. He decided, right there and then, that if the baby turned out to be his son or daughter he would do whatever it took to fight for them and for Kerry. Nothing would stand in his way.

* * *

Cameron left the house in the early evening to begin his shift. In a way Kerry was glad to see him go, she needed some time on her own to think things through and decide what she was going to do next. She knew she couldn't keep lying but she needed to find out who the father of her baby was before she did anything rash. Acting on impulse alone, Kerry took out her mobile and dialled Smithy's number.

"Hi, it's Kerry," She said once he answered.

"Oh, hi," He replied and Kerry began to regret following her gut instinct.

"Are you busy?" She asked, knowing she was asking a lot of him.

"Why?" He was more abrupt with her than he had intended.

"I need to see you,"

"Kerry," He began, he paused and sighed. "Fine, I'll be over in fifteen minutes. Cameron isn't there, is he?"

**Sorry for the shortness! Please review! x x x**

"No he's not. Thanks Smithy." She smiled and ended the call. She felt better knowing that she wouldn't have to be alone the whole night.


	16. Choices to Make

Cold Feet  
Chapter 16: Choices to Make

_So sorry for the delay in updates. It's only been 2 years, haha! :P_

_Thanks to Amy (LightSpirit) for a lot of help with this chapter. A lot of the dialogue is her's. Thank you, hun! :)_

_Thanks to all the people who reviewed along the way, hope you enjoy this chapter._

* * *

Kerry dragged herself up from the sofa when she heard the doorbell chime. Although she had been the one to invite him over, she could help but feel a rush of anxiety in the pit of her stomach. Once again she wondered how things had become so complicated.

"Hi," She pasted a smile onto her face as she opened the front door.

Smithy seemed to be feeling as awkward as she was. "Hi," He replied, not moving from his place on the doorstep.

"Come on in," Kerry invited stepping back to let him pass, realising that in a few more month she would take up almost the entire hallway with her pregnant stomach. The thought only added to her anxiety.

Smithy noted that Kerry's hand had subconsciously moved to her stomach. "You go and sit down, I'll make us a drink."

Kerry nodded, not having the strength to argue and went back to her position on the sofa.

Smithy went into the kitchen and switched the kettle on, moving across the fridge to get the milk out. On a higher shelf he spotted an opened bottle of white wine and was about to call out to Kerry to ask if she wanted a glass when he remember that she couldn't. The thought made him realise that perhaps he had been wrong to come here, but Kerry had sounded like she needed him.

He finished making the tea and took the mugs through to living room with him, where Kerry was huddled on the sofa. Smithy couldn't help but notice how vulnerable she looked as he handed her a cup of tea.

He sat down on the opposite end of the sofa and sipped at his tea even though it was really still too hot to drink. Silence settled in over them like a suffocating blanket and Smithy fought hard to find something neutral to say.

"So, how's Cameron?" He finally asked.

"Fine." Kerry replied. Now that he was here with her she had no idea what to say or where to begin.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Smithy pressed gently. "Did you want to talk about us? About last night?"

Kerry felt tears burning in her eyes and she knew the show of emotion had very little to do with her pregnancy hormones. The tears began to spill over, sliding silently down her cheeks. Smithy looked at her in horror, setting his tea down and wrapping an arm around her shoulder. She seemed to fragile, so unlike the Kerry he knew and, well, loved.

Kerry settled into the warmth of his embrace, his arm securely wrapped around her. He stroked her hair gently with his free hand and Kerry felt herself relax. She shifted her position a little, turning so that she could brush her lips against his. He yielded into the kiss to begin with until he felt her tongue on his lips, trying to part them. He pushed her away almost roughly.

"No, Kerry, no." He was momentarily lost for words. "Kerry, you're getting married and you don't even know if this baby is mine!"

Feeling a little embarrassed and ashamed of herself, Kerry brushed away another tear. "No, no I don't know who the father is but I want to know; I need to know. I'm getting married to a man who might not be the father of my baby, for all I know you could be father." Her breath was coming in painful gasps now. "I am so messed up Smithy, I need someone to help me." She dissolved into tears and Smithy was worried that her behaviour might harm the baby in some way.

He rubbed her back, trying to soothe her but part of him knew that she needed to let out the feelings she had been holding inside.

"Well Kerry, your happiness comes first, at least to me. What exactly is it that you want?" He asked, gently.

She looked up at him through misty, blood shot blue eyes. "I don't want to hurt Cameron."

"You have to do what's right for you and for the baby, Kerry. If you really love Cameron and want to go through with the wedding, I'll support you as best as I can – as your friend."

"I don't deserve you, Smithy." She sighed, relaxing back into his arms again. Was it possible to love two men at the same time, because she was pretty sure she was in love with both Smithy and Cameron.

Kerry fell asleep in Smithy's arms not long after that, exhausted by her emotional outburst. Smithy gently carried her into the bedroom and laid her down on the bed, wrapping her up in the covers. Before he could stop himself he was bending over to brush hair back off her forehead and to press a kiss there instead. As he turned the lights off and let himself out of the apartment he couldn't help but wish it was his bed that Kerry was sleeping in tonight.

* * *

When Cameron arrived home from his double shift all he wanted to do was kiss his fiancée and climb straight into bed for at least eight hours sleep. However, when he walked in through the front door he was alerted by the sounds of heaving and vomiting from the bathroom. Throwing his duffel back down on the floor, Cameron raced to the bathroom and found Kerry on her knees, bent over the toilet. He bent down behind her and pulled her hair back with one hand and rubbed her back with the other.

As Kerry emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet, she realised that she could no longer hide her pregnancy from Cameron. She knew this day would come sooner or later, but she just wished the circumstances had been different.

"Was it something you ate?" Cameron asked a while later, handing Kerry, who was sitting on the edge of the bath, a glass of water to sip."

Kerry shook her head, feeling another onslaught of tears approaching. She was tired of crying and the way it made her head pound and her eyes sting.

"No, Cameron."

It dawned him right then. "Are you...are you pregnant?"

Kerry nodded, not able to meet his gaze.

"Wow, how far along are we? How long have you known about it?" He paused, suddenly the ecstasy was gone from his eyes. "It is mine, isn't it?"

Kerry began to cry again. "I think so." It wasn't exactly a lie

"Smithy." He ground the name out through gritted teeth. "It's his, isn't it?"

Kerry was crying harder now. "I don't know! Maybe!" It was then that she did lie. "But I haven't slept with him since we've been together, not like you and Kim." She said angrily.

Cameron looked chastised and fixed his gaze on his feet.

"I'm sorry Kerry, I don't mean to shout at you. This is just quite a lot to absorb."

"Do you still want to marry me?"

To her surprise, Cameron began to grin. "Of course, I do! I love you, Kerry." He paused. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up and we can talk about this later."

Before Kerry could argue he was already turned on the shower and undressing them both.

* * *

Smithy sat at his kitchen table, sipping strong coffee from one of his many West Ham mugs as he played the events of previous night over and over again in his head. All of the things he had said to Kerry were true, he wanted her to be happy and to be with the man she loved the most but part of him selfishly wanted her and to be the father of her behaviour. He wasn't sure how he would deal if Kerry married Cameron and the baby turned out to be his. He couldn't bear the thought of another man raising his son or daughter, even though he knew Cameron was a good man and a good father.

Once he had finished his coffee, Smithy put his mug in the sink with his breakfast plate and headed to work. He ran into Hayley in the corridor outside the men's locker room and debated blowing off some steam with her before the shift began, but he knew that wouldn't help anyone.

Instead he quickly changed and headed to the briefing room, where he took a seat at the front of room and noticed Kerry was missing. Andrea was nearby and he turned to her.

"Where's Kerry today?"

"Cameron phoned Gina a little while ago to say she wasn't feeling well so she's staying at home today. She's got a sickness bug or something."

Smithy nodded and wondered if Cameron had put two and two together and realised that it wasn't a bug but morning sickness instead.

* * *

While Cameron slept, Kerry laid in bed and stared up at the ceiling. She knew she should feel relieved because Cameron finally knew that she was pregnant and that the baby might not be his, yet he still loved her and wanted to marry her. Still, she couldn't help feeling like something wasn't quite right. She felt bad for lying to him about not having been unfaithful since the proposal but Cameron had cheated too.

She absentmindedly twirled the engagement ring around on her finger, trying to decide what exactly it was that she really wanted. She looked across at the man sleeping next to her and imagined their life together with her child. He was a great father to Emily and she was sure he would be even better with their own baby, even if it wasn't actually his. She loved him and he wanted to marry her. With her decision made, Kerry moved closer to Cameron and wrapped her arms around her fiancé's sleeping form.

She was sure she had made the right choice, she just hoped Smithy saw it that way.

_Please review! :) _


	17. Speak Now

Cold Feet  
Chapter 17: Speak Now

**Sorry for the lack of updates again. Real life just keeps getting in the way! Thanks, as always, for the reviews. Thank you especially goes to Amy (lightspirit) who was so helpful in making the chapter possible. You should go and check out her stories too! :)**

**Any errors and typos are my own. It's 1am so my brain isn't firing on all cylinders, forgive me!**

**Here is the first part of the finale of this story. All the loose ends should be wrapped up in the next chapter. I hope you've enjoyed reading this. I've enjoyed writing it even if it has taken me four years to complete! Xx**

* * *

Now that Cameron knew about Kerry's pregnancy, the couple decided to bring the wedding date forward. Planning a wedding was a stressful process and Cameron didn't want all the preparations to put a strain on Kerry during the last trimester of her pregnancy. For Kerry's part, she wanted to get married before her bump showed too much. She had been shopping with Andrea and they had found a dress that emphasised the extra cleavage she had gained during her pregnancy but skimmed over her slightly rounded stomach.

"It's beautiful." Andrea had said when Kerry had stepped out of the dressing room wearing it. Both of them cried tears of happiness as they studied Kerry's reflection in one of the bridal shop's many mirrors. "You look so beautiful Kerry."

Blotting at her tears with a tissue, Kerry nodded. Pregnancy definitely suited her. The morning sickness had passed off now and she was glowing and radiant. She was look as though she was about to enter the happiest phase of her life but somewhere deep inside she acknowledge that something was missing.

* * *

One morning when Cameron was at work but both Kerry and Smithy were on leave, she went to her former lover's house and told him everything. Smithy hugged her and promised to be supportive. She invited him to the wedding and he accepted although he had no idea how he was going to watch the woman he loved walk down the aisle to marry another man. If it was what she wanted, he would do it even if it broke his heart in the process.

* * *

Smithy was trying to stay upbeat and positive about life but it was difficult when all he had ever really wanted existed but was out of his reach. No one else knew that he was still in love with Kerry or that someone other than Cameron might be the father of her baby. Part of Smithy was dying to confide in Gina, his dearest friend.

One morning after assignments had been given out in the briefing room, Smithy went to see Gina in her office.

The older woman was studying her computer screen when Smithy knocked and entered the office. Neither of them spoke much as Gina began to type away on the keyboard and Smithy was comfortable just sitting in the chair opposite her desk, letting his mind wander.

"Did you come and see me about anything in particular?" Gina asked after a few minutes had passed. "Or is your own office not as comfortable?"

Smithy couldn't help but grin at the sarcasm in her tone. Things may have changed drastically in his own life but he could always rely on Gina to stay the same.

Gina could sense that something was bothering Smithy but she also knew him well enough to know he would only tell her when he was good and ready.

"This is odd." She piped up, having focused her attention back on the computer screen. She had been busy organising the work rota for the next few months and booking in the officers' time off work. "Unless my maths is very wrong...no, this can't be right..."

"What's wrong, ma'am?"

"Well, Kerry's maternity leave begins on the 16th and her baby is due on the 30th, but if I count backwards nine months, it just doesn't make sense." She clicked a few more times. "That means that Kerry must have fallen pregnant around the 16th of February, but I remember we were busy that week with a case because of that psycho who killed his girlfriend on Valentine's Day."

"What are you trying to say?" Smithy asked, his interest piqued.

"I know for sure that was the time that Cameron took off work to visit his relatives in Australia, because I remember wishing we had an extra pairs of hands to deal with all the crank calls and door to door interviews." She paused, the realisation hitting her. "This means that Cameron can't be the father of Kerry's baby."

"Oh my God." Smithy replied, feeling a little numb but knowing that emotions were going to come rushing in at any moment. "Excuse me." He said, getting up and nearly knocking the chair over before he hastily exited the office.

Even more confused, Gina sat staring at the computer screen, wondering what exactly it was that she had uncovered.

* * *

The big day was finally upon them and Kerry and her bridesmaids were getting ready at her apartment. The bridesmaids were all drinking champagne while Kerry sipped from a glass of apple juice, trying to soothe the jitters in her stomach. She wished she wasn't pregnant so she could dull her nerves with some alcohol but she knew she'd have to go through this without any Dutch courage. When she thought about sharing her life with Cameron and raising a baby together, she was overwhelmed with happiness but when she imagined it in her head her fiancé's face always transformed into Smithy's. She pushed all thoughts of him aside and concentrated on getting through the rest of the day.

A wedding car pulled up outside Kerry's apartment and Andrea and Honey, wearing teal coloured halter-neck dresses and carrying small bouquets of lilies, said goodbye to the bride to be and were driven off to the church. A few moments later Kerry's dad arrived, kissing his daughter's cheek and telling his daughter how beautiful she looked.

As she hugged her father, Kerry tried not to cry. She didn't want to ruin her make up after Honey had put it on so beautifully.

"Are you ready then, love?" Graham asked, seeming to sense his daughter's hesitation. After all, he did know Kerry better than anyone.

"Let's go," She nodded, locking the front door and climbing into the second wedding car.

Neither of them spoke during the short drive to the church, Graham correctly assumed that his daughter needed some time alone with her thoughts.

Kerry toyed absentmindedly with her bouquet of lilies as they navigated the streets of London and couldn't help but wonder if, for the second time, she was rushing into this marriage. With the service due to start in ten minutes, she had left it a little late for such a revelation.

* * *

Smithy was sat three rows back in the church, at the end of a pew. He was wearing a suit and tie, feeling uncomfortable and anxious. He still wasn't sure if he was going to go through with this or if he would actually let the woman he loved; the mother of his child marry another man. The most important thing was Kerry's happiness and he wasn't sure that crashing the most important day of her life so far was going to make her happy. Even if she felt the same way as he did.

The doors of the church opened and soft, classical music began to play in the background as Andrea and Honey walked down the aisle, looking beautiful, he couldn't help but notice. If he had been paying attention, he would have seen the way Neil's eyes lit up when Andrea passed by his pew.

The organ being to join the other instruments, swelling to a crescendo and Kerry and Graham Young walked down the aisle, daughter's arm tucked securely through her father's.

Smithy had never seen her look so breathtakingly beautiful in her white silk dress and his heart ached.

The music quietened down again as Kerry and Cameron, smiling at each other, went to stand together in front of the vicar.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join in marriage Kerry Louisa Young and Cameron James Tait."

Smithy held his breath as he watched the ceremony continue, unable to sit still in his seat. In fact, he was sure that one of Kerry's relations was glaring at him. Suddenly, as if someone had hit the fast forward button, the vicar was asking:

"Does anyone object to the union between Miss Young and Mr Tait? If so, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Smithy let out the breath he was holding, knowing that it was now or never and that his entire future would be governed by what he did in the next moment. Trying to still his shaking hands, Dale Smith made his decision.


	18. Ending of a Story

Cold Feet  
Chapter 18: Ending of a Story

**This chapter was supposed to be posted yesterday and I was going to thank every single person who had ever read, reviewed or added this story to their favourites. That didn't quite go to plan because I'm having horrendously stupid internet problems. So, I'll just say thank you to everyone who has been involved with this story in any way over the last 4 years - you're awesome.**

**This is the last chapter but there will be an epilogue soon to tie off all the loose ends. Song lyrics are once again from 'Speak Now' by Taylor Swift. As always, all errors and typos are my own.**

**If you'd be so kind as to leave one last review on the way out, it would be much appreciated. And now, on with the finale...**

* * *

As soon as Dale Smith had stood up, wiping sweaty palms on his jacket, he realised that he had made a mistake. As the crowded church turned to look at him, with expressions of horror and shock, he wished he hadn't even attended the ceremony let alone decided to act the part of the hero. With a sinking feeling, Smithy realised just how selfish he was being and how he had been forced to take this step just to see the truth. Standing up and trying to win back the woman of his dreams was something best left to the romance novels and weepy movies, not real life. He realised that, standing here, the person he loved the most was the person he would also be hurting the most.

Someone cleared their throat and Smithy glanced around to see that it was Kerry's dad, George. He felt a churning in his stomach, trying to decide what to do next. He had to do something, he couldn't just stand there without speaking forever. He foresaw two options: either he could mutter an apology and let Kerry and Cameron continue with their wedding ceremony hoping that someday they would forgive him for almost ruining their special day, or he could finally say what had been bubbling inside him for so long. Kerry may hate him for it, but at least, finally, his true feelings would be out there for her to hear.

"You object, sir?" The vicar asked, peering at him when he believed that the man was going to speak.

Dale tried to look at Kerry, wishing he could read the expression in her clear blue eyes but for the first time her face told him nothing. Cameron, on the other hand was glaring at Smithy with something approaching hostility.

"Yes, I object." Smithy said, feeling a little better as the words began to flow out. "I believe that these two should not marry."

"And why is that?"

Smithy looked at his shoes, seeing a distorted image of himself reflected in his polished leather shoes.

"Because I love her, and because..." He paused, outing Kerry's pregnancy and the fact that he was the baby's father in front of all these people, some who may not know anything about it at all, didn't seem fair at all. It definitely didn't seem like something someone who loved Kerry as much as he did would do. "Because we belong together." He corrected.

Andrea, who was beyond shocked that Smithy had interrupted the ceremony but not at all surprised by what he said, glanced at Neil. He caught her eye and smiled back at her, before they both focused on soap opera style moment that was playing out around them.

The vicar looked surprised too. For all of the wedding ceremonies he had presided over, he could remember only one other occasion when someone had spoken up when he had asked if anyone had any objections. His surprise grew and changed to horror when, in a flash of a black suit jacket sleeve, a fist flew through the air, punching Dale hard in the face. The other man recoiled, but he wasn't surprised. If he had been in Cameron's position, he would have reacted in the same way, he was sure.

For Kerry's part she was completely shocked. She herself had her own doubts about the wedding but she had never imagined Smithy would do something to make the decision for her. She was confused too, she didn't understand where all of this was coming from. When she had told Smithy that she was going to give marriage a chance with Cameron, he had seemed fine with it and happy for him. She had been happy to see him in the congregation; happy to see that he was there even if part of her wished he was the one waiting for her at the altar.

When Cameron's fist had connected with Smithy's face, Kerry's own hand had risen to her mouth to stifle a gasp. When the initial shock had passed, she found that she had rushed to Smithy's side, pulling back the hand that was clamped over his nose and mouth to assess the damage.

"Sorry, I'm sorry." Cameron managed, words failing him. He couldn't believe the turn of events playing out before him. He felt as though he was dreaming or had awoken into someone else's life. He didn't understand the part of him that was somewhat glad that Smithy had interrupted the ceremony before he and Kerry had said their vows.

"Can we... I think we... Smithy and I should probably talk for a moment." Kerry finally managed, suddenly hyperaware of all the eyes fixed on her.

"Does this mean..." Cameron trailed off, accidentally catching Kim's eye and feeling grateful that Emily was with a childminder. He didn't want his daughter to see this.

"No." Kerry said firmly, but then shook her head. "I don't know. I'm sorry."

Cameron sighed. "Me too."

Still having not said a word to each other, Kerry and Smithy headed to the back of the church and out of the door. The hallway was cold and Kerry found herself shivering in her dress.

"I can't believe you did this, Smithy. This is my wedding day and you crashed it!" Her voice was angry, it was more exasperated than anything else.

"I'm sorry." A sheepish grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, he couldn't help it.

"You don't look very sorry!" She had to fight back a smile of a her own, which seemed ridiculous. She should be angry with him; she should have thrown him out of the church and should be exchanging vows with her fiancé right now. Part of her couldn't help but feel relieved.

Seized by some impulse that he didn't bother to question, Smithy leaned down and kissed her passionately on the mouth. At first, Kerry resisted him but it only took a few seconds for her to be kissing him back with a fervour she didn't think she possessed. It was always different with him; better and more magical. She loved Cameron, she really did but what they had wasn't as explosive or electric as what she shared with Smithy.

"Dale!" She pushed him away somewhat regretfully. "I don't understand, why didn't you tell me how you felt when I told you I was going to go ahead and marry Cam?"

Smithy rubbed a hand over his face, feeling like a fool. "I should have done, I'm sorry. I just wanted you to be happy, and back then I didn't know that I was the father of your baby." He hadn't meant to phrase it quite like that, but the words had just flowed out.

"What?" Kerry almost shouted, unable to believe what she was hearing. Somehow, though, it felt right; it felt true.

"I should have told you, I'm so sorry, Kerry. I was in Gina's office when she was booking out your maternity leave and I released that Cameron couldn't be the father. Your due date fits perfectly with the fortnight he spent in Australia; the fortnight when we spent almost every night together."

Kerry groaned, why hadn't she thought of that? Had she wanted to deny that Smithy probably was the father to avoid being hurt? Had she thought that Smithy wouldn't be the kind of father Cameron could be. It all seemed ridiculous now.

"What happens now?" She asked, not questioning him. She knew him well enough to know he would never lie about something so important – not even to win her back.

"I want to marry you Kerry. I want us to live together, to raise our baby together. I love you; I've always loved you but I'll understand if you decide to marry Cameron. I should have told you everything sooner but I was afraid, I don't know if I deserve a second chance and I don't want to see Cameron get hurt, but I love you and I want this Kerry." He placed his hand lightly over her slightly rounded stomach and felt a strange sensation.

Kerry looked up at him, eyes full of tears. "The baby kicked! Dale, our baby just kicked!"

He hugged her, holding her body close against his as if he was never going to let go.

"Kerry?" They sprung apart like guilty teenagers when they heard a voice close to them. Kerry looked up to see Cameron standing there and her guilt only intensified. She rushed to him.

"Cameron, baby, I'm so sorry." She tried to blink back tears but wasn't successful this time. It was hard for Smithy to stand back and not try to comfort her, but he knew she needed this time to set things straight with her fiancé.

"Me too, Kerry." He sighed. "I love you, I do, and I do want to spend the rest of my life with you and the baby but I'm not sure if I'm the one to make you happy." He turned to Smithy. "I'm sorry that I hit you, Smithy, but you did deserve it." Smithy nodded in agreement, hiding another sheepish grin. "I was kind of glad that you had the guts to object," Cameron continued, looking at the both of them now. "Because Kim's here, at the back of the church and, as much as I love you Kerry, I think she's the one. It wouldn't be fair of me to be a full time dad to your baby when I have a daughter out there who could really use a father figure. I haven't talked to Kim yet but I'd like for us to try again."

Kerry swallowed, digesting the information. Once again her relief was almost palpable. She hugged Cameron. "I love you and I want you to be happy but I'm not sure I'm the person to give you that happiness. You deserve more than someone who is still in love with someone else. Go and be with Kim, and be happy."

He kissed her one last time, while Smithy looked on. "Goodbye Kerry." She waved sadly as he left them alone again.

"Are you okay?" Dale asked when Cameron was gone.

She slipped into his embrace, leaning her face against his shoulder. "Yes, for the first time in a long time I'm a lot more than okay."

Smithy grinned, reaching for her belly again. "I can't believe we're going to have a baby together." His green eyes lit up with joy as he rubbed her stomach.

Kerry smiled too, kissing him softly before breaking away and taking his hand.

"Come on, let's go!" She laughed dragging him out of the back door to where the wedding cars were waiting and jumped into the nearest one. Still laughing and exchanging kisses and smiles, the car sped away from the church as Kerry and Smithy headed off to begin their life together.

_And you say "let's run away now"_

_I meet you when I'm out of the church_

_At the back door_

_Baby, I didn't say my vows_

_So glad you were around _

_When they said "speak now"._


End file.
